Saturday, August 30, 2008

The Video Is Brought To You By The Letters T & V

I don't know about this Ben, Sesame Street seems like the wrong place to promote a movie like "The Cable Guy":



(I think the embedded video was taken down, but here's a link)


I don't know what year this video was, but the fact that The Cable Guy, a very-adult movie Ben Stiller directed, is referenced in the video just makes me feel weird.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

My Obama DNC Speech Drinking Game

Play Along At Home!

The Obama DNC Speech Drinking Game


If Obama Says…:.....Action That Should Be Taken:

The word “Change”...........Take a gulp of beer
The word “Hope” .............Take a gulp of beer
The word “Freedom” .......Take 3 gulps of beer

Mentions Energy Crisis ....Take 2 gulps of beer
Mentions Gas Crisis ..........Take a gulp of beer
Mentions the Economy .....Take a gulp of beer
Mentions the Poor ............Take 2 gulps of beer

Mentions Hillary ..................Take 4 gulps of beer
Calls McCain Old ..................Finish beer
Calls For Democrats to Unite ..Take 3 gulps of beer

Mentions God ..........................Take a gulp of beer
Mentions his Faith ..................Take a gulp of beer
Mentions his (ex) Pastor ...........Take 4 gulps of beer
Mentions being a ‘secret Muslim’ ...Finish Beer

Says “YES WE CAN” ................Take 2 gulps of beer

Hillary fans BOO during any
part of his speech .......................Take 4 gulps of beer
Calls Democrats
“The Party Of Jefferson” ...........Take 5 gulps of beer

Says “Change We Can Believe In” .............Take 4 gulps of beer
Mentions his “European Friends” .............Take 4 gulps of beer
Makes any reference to the Media ...........Take a gulp of beer

Mentions he’s biracial ...............................Take 2 gulps of beer
Mentions his childhood in any capacity .....Take 3 gulps of beer
Mentions “Checking Air in Tires” ..............Take 4 gulps of beer

Mentions his wife ..................................Take a gulp of beer
Mentions his wife and doesn’t call her by name ..Take 2 gulps of beer
Mentions his wife and doesn’t call her by
right name...................................................... Finish Beer

Says “Where All The White Women At?” ............Vote For McCain

Monday, August 25, 2008

"And I Won't Get Any Older, Now the Angels Wanna Wear My Red Shoes"

Happy birthday Elvis Costello!!!

The man out of time turns 54 today.



This video is from Saturday Night Live's 25th anniversary show, re-enacting Costello's "sabotage" of his own set back in the 70s.

My Apartment is a Safe Space for Gullible Women

After re-watching this Twix commerical:



It has become apparent to me that the executives at Twix have no clue what blogs are.


Also, just a suggestion guys, you shouldn't use the term "my struggle" when creating sympathetic politically oppressed characters.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Now her friends buy her!

A little late, but I don't care:

Have you heard? The British are FREAKING OUT! And, get this...it's over Barbie!

The Sun
has the headline: "S&M Barbie Is Lashed By Public"
My word! What is this all about?

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Mattel is releasing a fall line of Barbies that are based on DC Comic superheroes. Included in this collection are icons Wonder Woman and Supergirl, fan favorite Batgirl (Barbra Gordon), and my favorite comic book character to ever wear fishnets, Black Canary:


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Poor Dinah Lance is this "S&M Barbie" all because her costume (since the 1940s by the way!) contains fishnet stockings and black leather.

Golly! What would Dr. Frederic Wertham think? I mean, he claimed Batman and Robin are a gay fantasy, and that Wonder Woman's independence made her a lesbian! But...fetish gear made to attract heterosexual males? In comics? Gasp! Hang on to your monocles!



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Hey, S&M Barbie, have you met Bild Lilli?

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What do you mean no? She's family! In fact, she's the doll you were based on. Well, not you specifically S&M Barbie, but the original 1959 Barbie. Yeah, she's old. Let me tell you about Lilli: she was a German doll, that was primarily marketed to men as a sex toy.


Oh. Well. Now this is awkward, isn't it.

Yes, Barbie was based on a German sex doll, which makes this quote from British Group Christian Voice about S&M Barbie even funnier: “Barbie has always been on the tarty side and this is taking it too far. A children’s doll in sexually suggestive clothing is irresponsible – it’s filth.”

No, no, Bild Lilli, don't cry, they weren't talking about you, you were marketed to men...it's not your fault that Ruth Handler ripped off your design almost completely for her original Barbie doll...aimed at little girls...

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Here's a 1955 Lilli on the left, and a 1959 Barbie on the right.

Now you might be asking "where on earth did this Lilli come from originally anyway?!" Well, would you believe a comic strip?
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(Translation from German: "I'm a Whore. Let's go fuck!")



Oh My!

Lilli was a comic strip character created by Reinhard Beuthien for the German newspaper Bild-Zeitung in 1952. Her strips usually involved her using her sexuality to attract men and gain money. In fact, one newspaper (from Australia) even goes as far as to call her a "comic strip prostitute"

Now I understand why Ken isn't atomically correct. Who knows what diseases Barbie inherited from her slutty mother?

(On a side note, those Lilli strips kind of remind me of Harvey Kurtzman and Will Elder's Playboy comic "Little Annie Fannie". The main difference is try doing a google search of "Little Annie Fannie" and you get pages of results. Then try searching for the Lilli comic strip and you get the same two images that I posted here. How has this not been archived better?)




So, everyone that's freaking out over Barbie being dressed like Black Canary, S&M gear and all, maybe you should take a look at your tarty children's dolls' history first.

Plus, have you seen their Supergirl doll? Jeez, she's only like 16 in the books...

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Looking Over My Blog

Man, do I need to learn formatting.

There's been a lack of updates recently, I know. I've been looking for a new place to live and that's taken up most of my time. I'm going to try to update tomorrow. Anybody hear about that whole Black Canary Barbie thing? We'll, I have some stuff to say about it...three weeks late.

Whatever, no ones reading anyway.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Politicos Will Latch Onto Anything To Prove Their Point

This was sent to me:

"Liberals live in a world of “and.” Full security and full civil liberties. Universal health care and the best quality with no waiting. A dynamic economy and full welfare and unemployment benefits. Liberals, in other words, live in that scene in Spider-Man in which Spidey, forced to choose between saving a tram car full of innocent civilians and saving his girlfriend, chooses both. Liberals live in a fantasy.

Conservatives, though, live in a world of tradeoffs, of either/or. For having this relationship with reality, conservatives are caricatured as grumpy, stingy and negative. Surely all it takes is a bump in taxes on the wealthy and everything will be affordable? Where’s the Hope? Where’s the Dream? Yes, we can!"



Ouch.

And to think, the article was talking about the politics of The Dark Knight...